Shake hands with death

The fairy is nearing the delivery date, and under the urging of copper, it is already afternoon to leave from the unit to go home in the harsh environment of thunderstorms.. Her mother-in-law carefully looked at the fairy’s bloodless face and said, ” Why is it so sallow?”? Mom, I have always been in good health and have never caught a cold. Tomorrow, let copper accompany you to the hospital to check the development of the fetus, and you’d better also check your body. The fairy returned to her room to take a mirror and carefully examine her slightly bloated red and white beautiful face, then look at her swollen belly and always hard body, and smiled confidently.. The next day, Fairy and Copper went to the People’s Hospital for B – ultrasonic examination. The fetus is all right and she has undergone various examinations after the doctor examined her complexion.. When waiting for the result, he came out of the hospital. The rain in winter is no longer called rain. Snowflakes are falling down carefully and the ground is already covered with white.. The fairy was filled with happiness for her mother. She had already ignored the chill and went to the baby clothes store with copper.. He bought two clothes for the future children and returned to the hospital to test the results.. The fairy’s maternal joy is still rippling on her face. as she walks toward the front, the middle-aged woman doctor looks regretfully at her young face and then at the copper behind her. ” girl, you have too few platelets and red blood cells are much lower than normal people. I’m afraid our hospital can’t produce for you safely. please go to the big hospital.”. ‘ fairy’s heart” hitched” once, jumped up in a hurry. ‘ I . ” This is the test result. You’d better check it again in Beijing or Shanghai. ” .” White Disease ”’ Three harsh characters like magnified demons came at her. ‘ Impossible, impossible . ” The fairy trembled. Copper took the test report and held the fairy out. ‘ Not afraid, maybe wrong, I go to other hospitals to check again. ‘ copper consternation after a moment of calm like a post ironing agent, warm the fairy frozen nerves.     From another hospital, the fairy looked at the swirl of snowflakes that did not know when they had grown larger, and the cold air rushed into her skin made her frozen mind clever. Looking back, the hospital was still a hospital, with white nurses and visiting doctors living regularly in their tracks, but everything in the eyes of the refraction fairy changed quietly, looking at the unlucky copper around her without saying a word.. Fairy just suddenly grew up, from a young girl to a young woman, it’s time to learn to mature. And she is only 23 years old, how much can she bear the load in her heart?     When he got home, copper told his parents the news without reservation. After the in-laws were dismayed, they were confused and uneasy.. Finally, after the in-laws and merchants association decided to go to the big hospital the next day for another review. That night, the fairy lay wearily on the bed, her lungs churning. The bad luck and the bad luck just fell from the sky. She thought of brushing her teeth often to shed blood on her teeth and the purple patches on her body. Is everything true?? Mother and aunt also have lower platelets and red blood cells than normal people? Don’t they still live well? Can think of leukemia dead uncle, fairy can’t help but shrink all over, she didn’t tell the living have raised parents. She doesn’t want to give this big joke to her parents. She should learn to bear some things alone. She looks at the exhausted copper that snores and sleeps like a dream. It is no wonder that his attitude is suddenly cold. They have only been married for less than a year and have no deep-rooted love. How can they yearn for him to hold up a day for her? Besides, his age does not make him able to stand alone and his chest..     Once again, after the disease was confirmed, the fairy was admitted to the city hospital and lost plasma to maintain her life and that of the child in her womb.. Fairy often closes her eyes, does not want to have any thinking, quietly feels the red blood trickle into the pulse, feels a star in the night flashing her faint light at a very high altitude, and feels a dry, slender hand waving its teeth in the distance . ah, copper, at the urging of her parents and without the consent of the fairy, told the news directly to her parents in the early days.. Yes! Such an extraordinary load, why only let the unrelated ones bear it while their biological parents stay away from it?? Looking at the frantic father who suddenly bent his back and his mother whose eyes were swollen and bewildered, the fairy never had a heartache and hissed at her heart.. Never willful tears pouring out. ‘ dad . mom . oh, you don’t do this, I will be more uncomfortable, maybe it is the role of fetal gas, maybe the child was born. Fairy will never know, and inform her parents in time whether to discuss a major decision about her life, whether to transfer to a big hospital or stay in this city hospital, facing the problems of the fetus due and her safety, and more importantly, the medical expenses to a big hospital.. Parents who do not have much financial resources still let their parents-in-law make a decision after much deliberation.. After discussing it, the in-laws decided to give birth to a child in the city hospital before making any plans.. She is only their daughter-in-law who has passed the door. How can she expect them to do their best? But the hospital has repeatedly stressed that adults and children are responsible for their safety.     The fairy often closes her eyes, and the invisible man’s hand crushes toward her in the dark, merciless and cruel, and fear tightly hangs over the fairy’s enlarged head.. In any case, she should be strong, persist and fight with her ruthless hand. She has too many responsibilities to bear. Her mother is laid off and she lives on the laid-off expenses.. Father is a honest farmer who has never been out of the village gate in his life and has worked so hard to raise her and support her to go to school. She was lucky enough to pass the exam and take care of her parents, but . How can a child to be born have no mother at birth?? The star in the night suddenly lit up a lot, and the fairy’s mood gradually stabilized. After a blood transfusion, she took all the people away and quietly walked into the doctor’s room..    The fairy was very calm. Although she did not fully understand the complicated causes of leukemia, she knew that she belonged to chronic leukemia. If she paid attention to it, she could live a few more years, perhaps to create a miracle of life for her son..     In private, her mother-in-law suggested that the old men on both sides should discuss the issue of replacing her bone marrow, and the fee should not be used for the time being. Considering her brother, her mother denied that it was impossible to replace her daughter’s life with her son.. No matter how she does not promise, the tone carries the smell that the mother-in-law is not doing all she can and that her mother-in-law can do nothing about it.. The fairy said uneasily, ” Mother is thinking that her brother’s health has not always been very good, and besides, it may not be possible.”. Fairy can understand mother’s difficulties, daughter has been so, how can she let her often sick son have the slightest mishap again?     Mother also mentioned anxiously the possibility that the copper family would not do its best to cure her. The feelings are thin and the life of copper is still a long way off. They are mainly worried about the children in the womb.. The fairy listened woodenly. The waves in her heart were enough to drown her already weak life. She felt that she was unimportant and needed comfort. The old people on both sides should have worked together to discuss how to heal her illness. Now it is suspicion and dissatisfaction.. Fairy wants to get over this, but the hot sunshine outside the window and the peristalsis of the child in her womb make her give birth to an infinite desire for life. The hand in the dark is like a monster stretching out to her again, and she instinctively retracts and retreats … ” Mom, if you stand in their angle, maybe you also think like them, this is the selfish instinct of human subconscious, and I am not quite stuffy.. Why are you so bitter? Who let me have this disease? If they can be cured, they may try their best, but the result is that they have both money and human resources.. You can understand more. Don’t make it difficult for each other. The mother listened to her daughter’s considerate words and her attitude of letting nature take its course, tears fell down, and the poor words of ” rustling” made him not have a word of comfort to comfort the fairy, nor would she hide the bad luck and complaints about the fairy, so that the fairy often blamed herself for dragging him down while feeling pain, and the discontent of her in-laws often blurted out unconsciously..     Fairy is most afraid of hearing hurried footsteps and loud mourning in the emergency room. Fairy’s pale face often turns yellow. At her repeated requests, the hospital transferred her to the normal delivery room.. In the cries of pain that will be for the mother, there will always be cries from babies. Fairy gradually got used to this sound in the delivery room and also liked this life transfer. Every time she touched her big round belly, it was time for the child to be born safely. Why didn’t she come to the people?? Don’t be afraid that his arrival will take away his mother?     At the doctor’s suggestion, the fairy walks in the hospital every day after dinner so that the baby can give birth smoothly. The dazzling sunshine makes the fairy never feel so bright and warm. Looking at people of all ages in the past, her desire for life has never been stronger in the face of their different pains.. She’s still young! The scenery of life has just begun. She wants to be a mother and a teacher. She wants to taste all the stages of life and play all the roles she needs to play. She can’t give up so easily. Maybe everything will come true once the child is born. Under such a mood, the fairy is eager to give birth to the child..     The fairy closed her eyes, felt the pain of the doctor’s hands pressing down on her stomach, and flew toward the sky in a faint and heavy state, with countless flashing stars scattered in the dark sky.. The fairy flew slowly, and did not intend to twist a head. The withered hand was about to grab her feet. She was terrified and flew desperately toward the sky. Ah, the baby’s crying woke the fairy, and the joy of the doctor first came into view. ” Congratulations on your smooth delivery.”! As a boy, you should know that excessive bleeding can be fatal to a body like you, and you are surprisingly few. God really has eyes for you.. The fairy looked at the flesh-and-blood life she had created next to her and relieved her face..     The fairy’s platelet miraculously rose to 60, the same as her mother’s, and the fairy herself was able to get out of bed and move around after childbirth, which could not help but make the whole family suspect the mistakes in the examination. The family was delighted and planned a celebration dinner for the mother and child. Her mother-in-law said excitedly, ” As long as the mother and child are safe, it is worth the extra money.”. ‘ fairy face one of the few glow, appetite is amazing. Copper seemed to be playing tricks on fate, and every cloud has a silver lining’s excitement was palpable. After the doctor made a routine examination of the child, he took the child from his mother-in-law and sent him to the oxygen tank. The mother-in-law who was shocked by the change of grief and exultation could not bear the recent blow and finally fainted to the ground.. The child is only slightly deprived of oxygen. The whole family breathed a sigh of relief. A series of financial expenses have already put an unbearable burden on the in-laws and families. One week after the birth of the fairy, when the doctor’s advice requires another blood check, copper’s family members are driving to persuade the fairy to go home to mend her health and have a new year in congratulating her mother and son on their safety.. The fairy looked out of the window at the rare sunshine after the snow, looked at her awkward mother, and nodded hesitantly, thinking of increasing the burden on her in – laws..     The fairy went home and left her children in the hospital. The snow that had rarely seen for decades was swirling almost every day, and the sun occasionally showed its face once in a while, which was also a flash in the pan.. The fairy lies on the bed and warms her heart every time she thinks of her child. What’s her name? Call it ” one by one”. He is my only one. My life is almost one – to – one. Fairy is thinking.     When the child came home healthy, the fairy could not help but want to hug and catch a cold unconsciously.. The fairy who had never caught a cold did not mind, thinking she would be well in two days, but unexpectedly did not get better after a few days and burned. The fairy ate’ amoxicillin’, and her mother-in-law did not know where to get the list of traditional Chinese medicines, but also stayed up and drank for the fairy with concern. A few days later, the fairy on the bed did not get better, but had a high fever, so that she could not stand up in bed, only two days before New Year’s Day. She wanted to go to the hospital again after a year, but she suddenly fell into a coma and had to be sent to the hospital on the 30th of the year..     The news was like a bolt from the blue, because’ amoxicillin’ and traditional Chinese medicine did not play a positive role, but instead strengthened the reduction of red blood cells, and because of the persistent high fever in recent days, chronic leukemia became acute rapidly, and doctors even asserted that she could not live for ten days..     The expensive medical expenses make the in-laws distressed and anxious, under the extremely haggard face that the father-in-law is very drag down. The fairy volunteered to leave the hospital at the time of blood transfusion in three days.     Looking at the baby waiting to be fed, fairy Chang Zaixin remained silent after the pain.. Copper is not unexpectedly let fairy go to the big hospital for treatment, but how much can he afford? But watched his wife who had a life together die alive? Conscientious condemnation kept him from sleeping at night. Because of the fairy’s illness, the family was eating the old age and the hard-earned money from their parents, which was another kind of condemnation and guilt, he decided what to take on himself. A person quietly goes to sell blood, and it seems that there is only one thing he can do.     Fairy can feel that the whole family is only maintaining their conscience to treat her. whenever the bones take time out of pain, copper just takes the money from her father-in-law and loses blood for fairy. at this moment, fairy can feel the weight of life only when she floats lightly.. It was already winter and spring, and the grass spat out the buds and watched the children grow up day by day. Only then can the fairy have pride and comfort in life..    One day, the fairy was lying in bed when the voice of her colleague came and said that she had entered the room. Fairy never expected that when she was suffering from the inferiority she was to be abandoned by copper and her family, only the people she worked with came to see her, and the flowers she was pregnant with.. Fairy and they talked freely about their illness and always said to the fairy’s mother-in-law that ” no matter how hard it is, do your best.”. A man cannot go against his conscience. Sooner or later, there will be retribution. Why don’t you try your best to be a good daughter – in – law? Alas, to cure her is already a debt of debt. This is not the case, is it. A family does not know the difficulties of a family. ‘ listen to her mother-in-law hypocritical voice, fairy change the words. They pulled out a pile of money from their pockets before they left. Fairy, this is our colleague’s intention to see a doctor well. ‘ Fairy’s tears streamed out of her eyes without a process …… Ah, Fairy obviously felt a thick membrane between her and copper. When did this membrane start? From the day the matchmaker introduced him. At that time, she did not know his character, his thoughts and his attitude towards love. Even now they have not talked deeply about it. It is a drop in the ocean.. It is always thought that feelings are built up bit by bit in the daily trivialities of common life.. Otherwise, it will be like fireworks, and their fireworks do not seem to have officially bloomed yet. They have already been wet under strong winds and snowstorms, but now it is spring. Does her life not have a hint of spring? Does God really treat her so harshly and heartlessly?     I haven’t had a blood transfusion for ten days. The pain in my bones made the fairy close her teeth and brimming with the desire not to be discovered by anyone.. Lying in bed at night, wallowing in pain, covering her face with a quilt and crying in a low voice, I really want to go through this pain. What else can I care about?. Parents have elder brothers, children have copper and in-laws and their love for him will not be mixed with a little fake. Thinking of this, the fairy ignored the pain of her body and let her body float to the sky. Her hands in the night are clearly visible and moving toward her quickly, as if saying, ” Let’s go, I’ll take you to the heaven and earth far away from the starry sky.”. There was no pain, no struggle, no care … Ah, only pure happiness … ” The fairy held out her hand, and when she was an inch away from her hand, her parents’ voice of grief, her child’s mournful eyes clasped her heart, and her childhood dream mirage life was reflected behind her.. ‘ miracle will appear at any time. The fairy’s ear rings such a voice, and her strong attachment to life urges her to use all her strength and strength to shout ” Help me .” The fairy has once again been admitted to the city hospital, with parents, copper and leaders in the shadows. From their tears, it can be seen that they cried for her, saw her wake up, sympathized with and loved their eyes flowing in both directions, looked at the white walls and white light, and the fairy knew that she was alive, and it was a life and death event.. Fairy, I talked to your parents about this problem. I want to go back to reflect it to my superiors and see if I can help you. Thank you . thank you . ” said the fairy weakly. ‘ children, you can wake up, is mom sorry for you. Parents can’t earn so much money to cure you, but you can’t hold on! Parents will find ways to transfuse blood for you. Mom . Don’t waste any more money . Ah, I really can’t . ” The fairy choked.     After being hospitalized for more than a month, my parents-in-law never showed up and seemed to understand something from the embarrassment of copper. The fairy never said a word of reproach. After the fever subsided and the illness stabilized, the fairy insisted that she always accompany her father out of hospital. She really didn’t want to spend any more money from her parents.. This time, the fairy went straight back to her mother’s side, and her in-laws did not seem to have her place. More importantly, she wanted to leave perhaps not much time to her parents, good memories of her childhood, and peace of mind without much thought.. Mother is holding her niece to stand at the intersection and look at this place. This is the intersection where she has had many fun childhood events, how many studies she has had, and the time when she went to copper.. These are like speeding past, leaving only parents’ eternal love and copper’s few remaining sympathies..     ‘ mom, I’m back. The fairy looked at her neighbors and was already wet by the already dry tear nest.. ‘ it is good to come back, we will have a way. Listen to mother’s old voice and look at her swollen eyes and wrinkles in vain. Sad waves surging. ‘ children, don’t cry, we go home. The leaders of your unit have already reflected to their superiors. They are donating money . Ah, boy, there are many people who care about you? You have to be strong and brave, and your parents will always accompany you … ” Yes, yes …” Listening to the sound of close neighbors, the fairy moved to pull this person’s hand and that person’s hand … Ah, the fairy looked at the warm letters and expressed gratitude constantly. Colleagues and superiors came to visit her one after another, bringing many relief words. The fairy’s smile always rippled on her face and her mood was never so enlightened.. The strength to walk is also sufficient. From the original three days of blood transfusion, it was extended to four days, five days, six days or even ten days. Fairy wants to go on like this and wait a few months to work and live like a normal person. She even wanted to bring her children in person in the future, thinking of the copper that has not been seen recently, and the clouds passed through her mind, but was soon diluted by the love and conversation of relatives and friends … ah fairy received the medicine for free treatment provided by the red cross, and her heart could not be calm for a long time, so she decided to write back her gratitude and love for life. when she wrote the word’ thank you letter’, she suddenly felt unconscious and beat hard, unconscious, she panicked and eagerly cried out to her mother … ah fairy was admitted to the hospital in the provincial capital, which is the largest hospital the fairy lived in, and finally her father brought in..     The fairy felt her physical and mental exhaustion of her struggle for life and life. She had no power to ask everything outside, and her hands had no power to lift it..In addition to eating a little rice from her father, she kept her eyes tightly closed, letting the stars in the night disappear and letting her dry hands shake in front of her.. The fairy did not have the power to avoid, let her do all kinds of actions, sometimes touching her body. instead of pain, she felt comfortable and relaxed in giving up everything.. The carefree game of playing hide-and-seek with a little girl friend in childhood; The excitement of reading under the light and doing homework with the highest scores and the happy smile of parents; When I was in college, the sour and sweet love I had for a boy was flashing in front of me.. There is also the understanding of Jing and disappointment when marrying copper, the joy of pregnancy, the surprise of relatives and friends visiting, the happiness and gratitude of strangers donating money … ah, too much and too much different from ordinary people’s taste and feelings have become a passing cloud.. Perhaps let the hand in the night seize her to fly through the night and fly to another new world, a new life, perhaps only by grasping it can all those who love her or love her be freed. There will always be a calm time when the whirlpool aroused by stones in the sea, as long as she sinks to the bottom of the sea, although everyone will suffer more or less..     The fairy held out her hand slowly, and she could vaguely catch her father saying that it was an abandonment of her that copper was not exposed once.. There is every reason to accuse them and so on. They can only be condemned. In the days of dispute, how long can this condemnation last? They will forget her slowly. She should not have too much regret. She saw the Spring Festival again and felt the new chardonnay. In this hot summer, she should have hidden … Ah, fairy’s hand and dry hand finally touched each other.. The fairy clutched it tightly and hopefully flew into the air, into the distance, into another very different world with a cool breeze … ah